Letting kids do their thing....and gain confidence.

This made me happy - to see an activity for kids that had not been ruined by budget cuts or fear of liability. Today, on my walk to the beach, I saw kids getting a lesson in ocean kayaking. I am guessing it was this L.A. County Dept of Beaches and Harbors program. The kids seemed so excited! They looked to be about middle school age. What a great thing, especially for kids who don't get to the beach very often. I sure would have loved this break from the classroom when I was in school, but growing up in Queens, New York, this was definitely not an option.

I think kids benefit when they are entrusted to do "real" and challenging activities (under appropriate supervision of course).  Or perhaps even without proper supervision.

I remember letting my daughter use a chef's knife in the kitchen at a fairly young age and she was quite proud of herself because of it. I guess you have to know your child though, and I knew she was the type to take the responsibility seriously and not take frivolous risks. And of course, I instructed her in proper technique and supervised her at first.  (And now as an adult, she is a great cook!)

I tried to remind myself that there was a time when children were married by thirteen! Not that I'm advocating for that.

I'm not quite as cocky about most physical risks though. I recall being glad she didn't want to surf or skateboard. I'm too much of a worrier. Although I would have let her if she wanted to, but I would have worried. I still worry, even though she's grown up, when she takes a long drive up to the Bay area or is out in her car late at night! As I tell my pregnant patients who are worried....welcome to motherhood, the worrying never really ends, it just changes...at least if you are the worrying type.

I also recall letting her do the family food shopping alone, when she was about eleven maybe? I don't quite remember the age, but I remember her friend's mother being shocked. I guess everyone has to do what feels right to them. I drove her to the supermarket and gave her the list and I waited in the car while she shopped and then I went in when it was time to pay. It was a win/win as I got to relax and she was very proud of her accomplishment.

I think this kind of activity does more to bolster self-confidence then the empty awards that are sometimes given out at schools and camps.